A MUM has revealed the three “controversial” things that keep her marriage thriving after 13 years – and a holiday divorce is just the start.
Jennifer Smith, 41, and her hubby, 42, have been together for two decades but are still as loved up as ever.
Mum-of-two Jennifer Smith has enjoyed countless holidays without her hubby[/caption]
And the mum-of-two, from Edinburgh, hails their passion for independence as the key to their wedded bliss.
She admits their routine is “not for everyone” and “people are often shocked” but stands by their decisions.
First up, the couple – who have two daughters aged nine and 11 – regularly go on holidays without each other.
In a TikTok video (@athomewiththesmiths5), Jennifer said: “We still, 20 years later, two kids, a house, various jobs, we still go on at least one separate holiday a year.
“He has his lads’ holidays, I have my girls’ holidays and it just keeps us happy.
“If we can get away together for a weekend or anything on top of that then brilliant, but I am more than happy for him to go away for a few days with his friends, let loose and relive his youth.
“I love going away with my friends or my sisters, we always have a great time, we check in regularly back home.
“We’re just not that couple to be jealous and to not let each other do things.”
And they’re not alone as solo holiday firm Flash Pack has found that couples are deliberately taking separate trips to pursue individual hobbies and interests – dubbing the trend the ‘holiday divorce’.
Rather than signalling distance, they insist it can actually strengthen trust, confidence, and connection.
Speaking to Fabulous, Jennifer – an executive leader with Tropic Skincare – revealed that their holiday set up means they are always covered for childcare too.
“My husband is amazing”, she said.
“I can leave him at home for days. I might have to set out the girls’ outfits but I can 100% fully trust that he’s looking after them.
“They’re clean, they’re healthy, they’re fed. I never need to worry about what’s going on at home.”
But she added: “It’s never more than three to five days, five days would be my absolute max.
“It’s never a week or two week holiday. None of us would want to be away for that long. And I think the mum guilt would definitely take over if it was for any longer.
“We always go on holiday as a family yearly too. The kids don’t miss out just because we like our solo trips”
In recent years, Jennifer has enjoyed solo holidays to Las Vegas, Dubai and Tenerife – as well as free trips to Greece and a Caribbean cruise paid for by Tropic to recognise her hard work and success in the company.
Jennifer and her husband both enjoy solo holidays[/caption]
Jennifer doesn’t have to worry about childcare when she’s away[/caption]
And while her peers support her holiday arrangements, the mum admits that she faces some judgement from the older generation.
“I would say it’s just because it wasn’t the done thing for them”, she said.
“They would never have gone away without their husband. I can imagine my poor granny if she saw what was going on now she’d be like ‘oh my god’.”
It’s not just holidays that Jennifer likes to keep separate from her other half either.
The pair have never had a joint bank account and don’t share finances.
She explained: “When we started our relationship as 22-year-olds we were in completely different situations.
“He owned his flat, I had recently moved back in with my mum. So we had separate finances and then as life progressed we moved house, we’ve had children. We’ve just never shared finances.
“We are free to do whatever we want [with our money]. So that means if he wants to spend £150 on trainers I can’t be mad at him. If I spend £150 on new shoes or a new dress he can’t be mad at me.
“He’s quite happy with the money that he’s got to spend on his nights out and whatever, I’m happy to do what I’m doing and it’s just never really been a big conversation and it works for us.”
Apart from date nights, the couple also admit that most of their nights out are separate.
Jennifer said: “We use a lot of our childcare for work time so when it comes to nights out you pencil yours in the diary. If yours is in first then it’s your night and vice versa. This just works for us, we’re happy to do so.
“It’s not for everybody. We do have our date nights where if the girls are away then we can both go out together so we still manage to fit that in as well.
“But we mostly go out separately and I’m fine with that.”
