free html hit counter I had affair with married man 20 years older & was branded a home wrecker – if Louis Tomlinson was a woman he’d be too – My Blog

I had affair with married man 20 years older & was branded a home wrecker – if Louis Tomlinson was a woman he’d be too

WHEN Soccer Aid kicked off tonight, all eyes should have been on the football pitch.

Instead, attention and speculation has been swirling around the love triangle between Zara McDermott, Sam Thompson and Louis Tomlinson.

Portrait of Emma Woolf.
Sarah Brick – Commissioned by The Sun

Emma Woolf admits she’s had the ‘homewrecker’ label chucked at her – but her lover faced little criticism[/caption]

Sam Thompson and Zara McDermott reunited.
Sam and Zara dated for five years before splitting in December
Instagram
Louis Tomlinson and Zara McDermott kissing at a table.
BackGrid

Zara moved on with One Direction star Louis Tomlinson[/caption]

In a very awkward line-up, love rivals Sam and Louis were supposed to be playing on the same England team during the big charity match for Unicef against a World XI

Then, in a last-minute curveball on Friday, Sam pulled out, citing injury.

Given that he recently completed a 260-mile marathon over five days for Unicef, you could say it’s not surprising he had an injury.

Sam had been determined to take part in the match even after his gruelling marathon, telling his This Morning colleague Alison Hammond: “I’m still very sore, still got the torn calf. However, I am here at Soccer Aid HQ and it does not get better than this.”

But you can’t help feeling he was sore in more ways than one — and it’s his feelings that have really been injured.

I can’t imagine being in such close proximity to a love rival. I’d avoid it at all costs. And we all know there is no such thing as “letting bygones be bygones”.

But when Love Islander Zara’s ex-partner Sam and current boyfriend Louis were pictured in training last week, it was all macho smiles, back-slapping and in Sam’s words “no hard feelings”.

If One Direction singer Louis was a woman, he wouldn’t get such an easy ride.

Romantic getaways

This display of male solidarity highlighted the double standards in society.

I don’t need to look far to imagine how the narrative would have played out if these two were women. Sam would be the victim and Louis would be dragged across hot coals, regardless of whether or not there had been a crossover between the two relationships.


No matter how long they left it before starting their romance, fingers would be pointed and the new woman would somehow be to blame for the break-up.

I know, as I’ve had the “homewrecker” label chucked at me while my lover faced little criticism.

Not a word has been said against Louis, as far as I can see. And despite the whole world knowing that Louis got the girl, Sam is determined not to lose face.

The I’m A Celebrity winner did his best happy-go-lucky impression, showboating and grinning his way through training for Soccer Aid and pretending he didn’t care that his ex’s new lover was there.

I was ‘mistress’ of a married man so wife’s  pals harassed me.


Emma Woolf

It is the blokey thing to do — they don’t want to appear the loser in the game of love. They use every macho weapon in the arsenal to avoid denting their pride.

They pretend they don’t mind that their best mate copped off with the girl they had fancied for years, or a cousin had a fling with their wife when they were going through a rocky patch.

Sam Thompson and Louis Tomlinson at a Soccer Aid 2025 training session.
Getty

In a last-minute curveball on Friday, Sam pulled out from Soccer Aid, citing injury[/caption]

Louis Tomlinson at Soccer Aid for UNICEF training.
Shutterstock Editorial

The I’m A Celebrity winner did his best happy-go-lucky impression, showboating and grinning his way through training for Soccer Aid[/caption]

But Sam and Zara, who split in January, were together for more than five years.

Deep down, like anyone else whose long-term partner has moved on so quickly and so publicly, it must burn.

Zara was pictured with Louis by March and they were official soon after.

At first, many dismissed her new relationship with the singer. But there’s no doubt it is for real — and things are hotting up.

Louis has been flying Zara around the world on a series of romantic getaways.

On Thursday night she was sharing pictures of her home-made “creamy salmon pasta” with Louis’ guitar visible in the background.

You wouldn’t blame Sam if he was feeling devastated, betrayed and angry.

The public aspect of this heartbreak adds a whole new level of humiliation.

And you can only imagine how Sam felt at the training camp — in the changing room, in team pep-talks and at dinner with Louis, whom Zara is now obviously heads-over-heels for, with all their team-mates well aware of the situation.

His injury has come at a convenient time, as it saves him the humiliation of having the world’s media pore over their every glance or backslap during the match.

Sam and Louis seem to have assumed they could swagger through.


Emma Woolf

If this were two women, one would be the sinner, her reputation dragged through the mud. The trolls would be out in force, calling her a trashy slut and trawling through her dating history, regardless of whether there was any actual overlap.

I remember the reaction to Kristina Rihanoff taking up with her Strictly partner Ben Cohen, with the pro Russian dancer insisting they got together after Ben split from his wife Abby.

She was called a homewrecker and there were calls for her to be axed from the show, but Kristina called out the double standards.

In 2005, when Hollywood’s golden couple Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston split, everyone took sides.

His new lover Angelina Jolie was crucified in public as the most predatory, husband-stealing female alive — even though at the time, Brad and Jolie had not confirmed whether their relationship had started before or after he broke up with Aniston.

Whether you were for Jen or Ange was a defining cultural moment. And yet Brad Pitt, who was the married one (not Angelina) escaped with his reputation intact, if not bolstered. Once again, double standards.

Ben Cohen and Kristina Rihanoff in a dance pose.
PA:Press Association

Kristina Rihanoff was called a homewrecker after entering a relationship with Strictly partner Ben Cohen[/caption]

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at a premiere.
Getty

Angelina Jolie was crucified in public for dating Brad Pitt after he split from Jennifer Aniston[/caption]

I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end, having had an affair with a married man 20 years my senior. And I can tell you it’s always the woman’s fault.

As the much younger, single “mistress” I was insulted and harassed by friends of the wife, whereas my married lover just got gentle warnings from his mates.

Blokey banter

Despite the fact I’d told him I would not get involved with him while he was with his wife, the blame was cast squarely on me, not him.

Although there’s no evidence of any overlap between Zara’s two relationships, and no proof of infidelity, the gap between her two men wasn’t exactly respectful.

Women are made to feel so much shame that the idea of encountering your love rival face to face is excruciating.

Sam and Louis seem to have assumed it would be fine, they could swagger their way through. No woman would have had the gall to be in the same public space as their lover’s recent ex. Female love rivals tend to avoid, and spurn, each other, doing anything they can to dodge crossing paths.

If I were Zara, I’d be squirming right now. There’s nothing more embarrassing than the thought of your exes discussing you. Worse, the idea of them possibly comparing notes in the blokey banter of the football changing room.

Timeline of Louis Tomlinson’s love life

Here we delve into Louis’ love life since his rise to fame in One Direction.

Hannah Walker – Louis’ first girlfriend, who he dated in 2010. They split in 2011 as his band One Direction took off and the long distance romance was too much for them.

Eleanor Calder – The pair dated on and off from 2011 to 2022. They were first photographed kissing at the London Olympic Games in 2012.

Briana Jungwirth – Louis dated American Briana in 2015 and they have a son named Freddie, who was born in 2016.

Sofie Nyvang – Louis was rumoured to be in a relationship with Danish model Sofie in February 2023. They split two months later in April 2023.

Two women, trapped in the same awkward love triangle, wouldn’t even have attempted to play on the same sports team.

So while Zara squirms, we have one victor in this battle. Louis might have done the gentlemanly thing and withdrawn from the team, instead of Sam.

He might have shown some humility, or sensitivity, when they met in the public glare. But all’s fair in love and war, and for now he’s the winner.

Not only does he have Zara waiting at home for him, he’s even got her creamy salmon pasta.

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